HEAVEN and HELL

A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying
the scenery when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.

He remembered dying, and that the dog had been dead for years. He
wondered where the road was leading them. After a while they came
to a high, white, stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine
marble. At the top of a long hill it was broken by a tall arch that glowed
in the sunlight.

When he was standing before it, he saw a magnificent gate in the arch
that looked like mother of pearl and the street that led to the gate looked
like pure gold.

He and the dog walked toward the gate and, as he got closer, he saw a
man at a desk to one side. When he was close enough he called out, "Excuse
me, where are we?"

"This is heaven, sir," the man answered.

"Wow! Would you happen to have some water?" the man asked.

"Of course, sir. Come right in and I'll have some ice water brought right up."
The man gestured and the gate began to open.

"Can my dog come in too?" the traveler asked.

"I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets."

The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued
the way he had been going. After another long walk and at the top of another long
hill, he came to a dirt road which led through a farm gate that looked as if it had never
been closed. There was no fence.

As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a
book.

"Excuse me" he called to the reader, "Do you have any water?"

"Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there." The man pointed to a place that couldn't be seen
from outside the gate. "Come on in."

"How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to the dog.

"There should be a bowl by the pump," the man said. They went through the gate and, sure
enough, there was an old fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it. The traveler filled the
bowl and took a long drink himself. Then he gave some to the dog. When they were full, he
and the dog walked back toward the man, who was standing by then, waiting for them.

"What do you call this place?" the traveler asked.

"This is heaven," was the answer.

"Well, that's confusing," the traveler said. "The man down the road said that was heaven too."

"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell."

"Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"

"No. I can see how you might think so, but we're just happy that they screen out the folks who'll
leave their dogs behind."

- Author Unknown